Mastication

Sometimes I feel like a complete freak. I know I AM a freak, but it seems to me that my pet peeves sometimes make me a bit overly freakish. I know I have freak like behavior – the salt on apples thing, the french fries dipped in ice cream thing, the turning toilet paper rolls around so that it comes from the front of the roll instead of the back thing (I do it even at other people’s houses..if I have been to your place and you are one of those paper comin’ from the back of the roll people, I have done it to you too), the towels having to be folded a specific way thing, the making it so my food doesn’t touch on plates thing (yes,I literally will separate the veggies, starch and meat/fish so that they all have their own area on the plate) – there are many many more…..

Now, I know these things could and do severely irritate people or bring unmitigated amounts of mocking to my doorstep. Hey, let’s face it, it is fun to point and laugh at people; and if you just said “I do not do that! I was raised to be polite!” then YOU are the ones that me and my friends are pointing and laughing at (when not doing it to each other). However, I can not stand – and I am talking throttle the person until they are begging for their mom and for mercy – when people are chewing. Mastication. I hate it. If I am eating at the same time, then it doesn’t bother me at all..but I really hate the sound of food being masticated or slurped in front of me. God forbid you are eating an apple near me when I am not eating at the same time. I have no idea where this pet peeve comes from! Seriously, I was chattin’ with a colleague today and she was mentioning how that aside from being the “queen of strop” (gotta love British slang) she was having seriously homicidal thoughts in her head due to an individual in her meeting room directly across from her “chewing gum with his month open and i fear i may smack him”. This sent us off on a whole tirade of how each of us has the same pet peeve. I personally told her to look at him and just say "mooooooooooooooo"



So..note to all of you who encounter me when you are eating. I had better be eating too, or that look on my face will mean that I want to throttle you within an inch of your life…

…there..I feel better….

It's the Little Things

Like THIS:

that can make one's day turn from frustrating to relaxing. A vendor to my department took us out for a "customer appreciation" evening (read: schmoozing). We went to a shooting club and I fired hand guns for the very first time. Above is a .500 Smith & Wesson. The largest production hand gun maded (sort of like the Desert Eagle). My hand still hurts from the recoil on that sucker.

I shot a:

.22 caliber Ruger
9 mm Glock
.44 caliber Mag(hello Dirty Harry)
and
.500 caliber Smith and Wesson...


Of course, the range instructor made me be the first one to try the .500 when it was time to shoot that one..considering I am American.. I told him that we are issued guns when we get a passport. Every American has one :) NOT

While I enjoyed the target practice exercise of the .22, I think I will not be shooting again. It was an experience and now I have the shell casing from the 9mm, .44 and .500 on my desk as memories of my shooting experience.

Flarn Filth Filth Flarn and Filth

or otherwise known as Fucking Fucker Fuck God Damn and Fuck!

Ya know what pisses me off? When certain people in authority tell you something you will be getting and then what they told you you are getting isn't what you got. What the hell?!?!?!

Remind me never to take a "promotion" to a job that is tons more work than I used to do, incredibly ladened with more responsibility and tasks and believe the boss when he tells you that the salary increase you will recieve will not be insulting.

Consider me insulted...

in·sult (ĭn-sŭlt')
v. in·sult·ed, in·sult·ing, in·sults
v. tr.


1.) To treat with gross insensitivity, insolence, or contemptuous rudeness.
2.) To affront or demean

Fucking Fucker Fuck God Damn and FUCK!!!

Just cause she asked

And before YOU ask, yes I commented on her blog

From Patricia:

YOU'RE ON MY FRIENDS LIST, I WANNA KNOW YOU... I want to know 34 things about you. I don't care if we never talk, never liked each other, or if we already know everything about each other. Short and sweet is fine... I just wanna know you better! Thanks! =) Just answer in the comments.


1. Can you cook?
2. What was your dream growing up?
3. What talent do you wish you had?
4. Favorite place?
5. Favorite vegetable?
6. What was the last book you read?
7. What zodiac sign are you?
8. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings?
9. Worst Habit?
10. Do we know each other outside of the Internet?
11. What is your favorite sport?
12. Do you have a Negative or Optimistic attitude?
13. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
14. Worst thing to ever happen to you?
15. Tell me one weird fact about you.
16. Do you have any pets?
17. Do you know how to do the Macarena?
18. What time is it where you are now?
19. Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
20. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
21. Would you be my partner in crime or my conscience?
22. What color eyes do you have?
23. Ever been arrested?
24. Wine, gin, singlemalt, can, bottle, Draft or teetotaler?
25. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?
26. What kind of bubble gum do you prefer to chew?
27. What's your favorite bar to hang at?
28. Do you believe in ghosts?
29. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
30. Do you swear a lot?
31. Biggest pet peeve?
32. In one word, how would you describe yourself?
33. In one word, how would you describe me?
34. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?