Puff Puff

What is with people lately?! Maybe it is part of my ultimate crankiness as of late, but color me pink and call me the Easter Bunny I really can’t stand soap-box anti-smokers. I mean really people. I know it is bad for me. I know the list of crap that they put in smokes. I know all about second-hand smoke and what it can cause, let alone what I am doing to my own lungs when I take a puff. I respect people’s desire and right to not be exposed to second hand smoke, which is why I DO not smoke around non-smokers. I will leave a room and go outside. I do not smoke in my home and nor do I allow anyone else to smoke in my home. I don’t smoke in people’s cars and I will not smoke in a non-smoking area. If I am in a group of non-smokers, I just don’t do it. I also agree that restaurants should be smoke free. As a smoker even I can’t stand smoke around me when I eat. Makes me nuts.
HOWEVER, if I have to have ONE more person comment: “You know, that is bad for you.” when they notice my pack of ciggie-butts in my hand, I am going to fricken choke them. No Einstein, I DIDN’T know it is bad for me. What the hell planet do you think I live on?! It is my frickin choice to pollut my lungs if I want to and ya know what? You can BITE me if you think I am going to take your holier-than-thou condemnation of my vice. I could have worse ones folks. I could be shooting heroin into my body. I could be self-mutilating. I could be a raging alcoholic. If I want to smoke I am going to smoke. I make every effort and concession to non-smokers but god damn it lay off the “You should quit.” crap. Give it a rest already.

Me---the raging bitch today…

Someone put me in a timeout please!?!

Have you ever had one of those days where you just want to revert back to childhood and pull the “I am taking my ball and going home!” kind of temper tantrums? Well, I have those lately. I think most of it comes from my geographical location and language challenges. I really do speak Finnish pretty well at this point (taking the National Proficiency Exam in April), and am comfortable in my new flat. It is beginning to feel like home when I go there. I guess my temper tantrum is a result of many factors at this point. Partially it comes from the very long and cold winter here in Finland. Okay to be fair, it really didn’t get THAT cold until January (right at my birthday btw). The temperature plummeted to -25 degrees Celsius, which is -13F and with the wind it was -38C which is -36.5F. It stayed that way for 2 weeks…warmed up enough to snow..And then plummeted again. All the news agencies in the States commented on how cold it was in Moscow…well it was cold as heck here too folks. It is slowly beginning to feel, now, like spring just might come again at some point. I know it will, but I am just tired of the winter and whiney about wanting weather which doesn’t require a scarf, gloves, thermal underwear, and where the sun shines for more than 8 hours. Now, I am not really complaining about Finland per-se, but just the winter right now. I really am actually happy living here. Mostly. Here is where the geography comes in. My best friend (Mira doesn’t count in this evaluation), lives 10,000 miles away and I miss her. Period. I miss my Sug. I miss hanging out and laughing so hard I can’t breathe. I miss a good G&T as made by Sug… I know that the distance doesn’t change that we are best buds…but I just wish I could ring her up and pop over and just hang… The 10 hour time difference and airfare costs kind of prohibit that happening easily and without planning. See, it is uncommon here in Finland for people to just pop over. Happens all the time in the States….but it is my experience here that people plan everything before going out…the spontaneity is just missing from the whole thing. So SUG, when you read this: I miss you. Suga for you.

Right…language. Now, I speak Finnish pretty well (as my friends will attest). I can get along in daily life in Finnish, I can go shopping, I can work and have meetings in Finnish (building contractors are excluded from this at this point due to not really ever having learned the words for that kind of trade specific communication)…but sometimes I just want to not have to translate every frickin newspaper and newscast into English in my head. I am getting to the point where I don’t have to (slowly) and “tuoli” means the thing I sit on and I don’t have to think “chair” first. The concept “tuoli” now exists in my head as the thing I sit on. (No SUG..what you are thinking of, in regards to the 49 Things, Now 50 due to Duane’s FABULOUS addition… is “pepu”…okay that is the cute word for it…the technical word is “perse”). Isn’t that what language really is anyway? Concepts put into a verbal and written form of communication? The first time I thought in Finnish was scary as hell… I have dreamed in Finnish at this point too…but when the chips are down and I am frustrated or need to argue I still switch in to the comfort language of English. I now am preparing for the National Proficiency Exam so I can apply for Finnish Citizenship. I need to pass that before I can apply. Additional stress that makes me want to stomp my feet and demand milk and cookies before naptime and a big recess break!

The point of all of this? I am whiney and bitchy and need a vacation. Preferably to an English speaking country….Oh and did I mention my Mother AND my redneck Sister are coming to visit in May?..For a frickin WEEK?!?! I love my mom,….but in small doses please! I now have to find stuff for them to do and figure out how I am going to entertain them doing things that don’t involve alcohol (Mom is a friend of Bill’s) or a bar. This is going to be tough for me as I frequently make the drunken phone call/text message to Sug, K, Sarah..etc… Heaven (if there is one) help me.

Excellent...warning..nasty language and graphic descriptions..

MLE is touring this summer!!! From her website:

Melissa 2006 Summer Tour Announcement
M.E.I.N. is excited to announce that
Melissa will be touring this summer! Stay tuned to melissaetheridge.com for
updates on Melissa's Summer Tour plans and ticket on sale information coming
soon!

DUDE!!!

Now..we all know that Melissa Etheridge is like a lesbian icon right?... I honestly have to say that I have seen her in concert about 12 times and each time it is awesome. Nothing like 10 thousand dykes singing the words of your songs back to you :)

Also.. Commander in Chief started here in Finland...rock on Geena!

Other interesting stuff. I listend to my friend Phil's podcast with this guy from Iceland..and about 30 minutes into the interview Phil asks him about social differences between Iceland and it's EU nordic counterparts... You know where this is going.. The whole gay's getting hitched thing came up.. This guy actually said that "gay sex is not normal sex". Now...um could someone define normal for me? Please? I am not sure what NORMAL actually is. Does this guy just have an aversion to the idea of a guy sticking his dingding in another guy's rumshaker or mouth? I bet this guy has no problem if his girl gives him little bootahy action or a blow job and considers THAT completely normal. Or better yet..what if he goes south of the border for his lady...I bet he considers THAT completely normal..so why is it abnormal when 2 consenting adults of the same gender get their freak on?...GRRRRRRR Normally I am not so militant, but damn it I hate having the stupid "NORMAL" label thrown around...

Mighty..

It is the little things that make you smile....that and a really cool soundtrack. I have always wanted a theme song and NO SUG, "Jessie's Girl" is NOT it ;)

I am mighty




hey..a healthy ego is a good thing :)

The cool kids...

Ya know what is really funny to me? That people mock my open and honest love of Barry Manilow. So for all of you doubting thomases (no offence K or D)...

Could it be magic? Manilow is a chart-topper again
By Andrew
Gumbel in Los Angeles
Published: 10 February 2006

The king of easy listening is back. It's been 29 years since
Barry Manilow last had a number one album, but this week he has pulled off the
old magic one more time.
Manilow's new compilation of golden oldies - what
else? - unexpectedly soared to the top spot in the US Billboard chart in its
first week of release, to the delight of his middle-of-the-road, predominantly
female audience and, no doubt, the horror of just about everyone else...."

That's right gang. You read correctly. Mr. Manilow has done it again! Come on, everyone..sing with me now..."His name was Rico. He wore a daimond...."

SAGA

Okay. So I promised a kitchen explanation to those of you who have been unfortunate enough to hear/read my rants on the subject of our blind shaved monkey kitchen guy and his escapades in fixing the sink area wall and installing the kitchen we designed over months of painstaking re-work and geometry too complicated for the mathematically challenged individual that I am. Right, maybe I am selling myself a bit short on the math thing… Nah, I am hopeless. I have to have a frickin computer to even do simple addition. As most of you know, I love to cook and so does Mira. The kitchen, to both of us, is the heart of our house. One look at my scale and you can tell why :)

We finally decided on the flat we bought specifically because we could have an open kitchen/living room arrangement. Our previous flat had the kitchen in an inconvenient location for full conversation sharing between the cook and guests. One of us was always running back and forth to check on the dinner being prepared so we would always miss part of the conversation etc. This flat had the “bones” we wanted (literally too) and our adventure began after signing our signatures 11 times each on documents at the bank and paying money.

Kitchen Design: We finally chose a “kitchen store” (Domus) to provide us the cabinets because of color choice limitations of all of the other stores (Parma, Petra, etc). Seriously. 10 color choices is not my idea of having a “choice”, and for those of you who don’t know, Mira’s livelihood is color. She can look at something and tell you the % of all colors in it. It is a spooky talent. Okay she is a pro, but still. I am hopeless. I tried to describe the color we chose and it was like “um..bluish with grey..but not too grey and not too blue”…and she just shook her head. Same thing with the color of the wall paints… I just tried to describe what I wanted, she picked up the color swatches and actually handed me the color I was describing and told me the name…which I still can’t remember.. So, after what seemed like 4907987 visits to the kitchen store we explained our design to the consultant and all she pretty much had to do was write down the measurements, and put it in something similar to CAD (geek I know). Voila, we had our design and our price tag. (Props to Mira for reducing the cost of our kitchen by about 3 grand without compromising on our taste and wants (mmmm hard wood counter tops)..She rocks). The sales consultant then gave us the name of the firm they use and the offer from them to install it.


….during these whole shenanigans it was decided that the walls of the sink area needed to be altered so that the cabinets would “sit properly” and that the walls would look appropriately nice… After having a friend’s workmate (both of them in construction) who promised to come look at it and give us an estimate, stand us up 3 times we called the referenced firm from Domus. Monkey Boy, which is what I refer to him as now, showed up, we explained what we wanted done, he took a look and said “Jep, ei hätää”. Which means: “Yep, no worries”….

…Fast forward 3 weeks.. Sink walls…HOLY HELL. The left wall, which was supposed to have a sheet rock panel installed over the brick (due to time constraints), had the worst plastering job you have ever seen and it had more dips and holes than a rally course…. Fear began to settle in…. When he arrived to do the kitchen wall work, we informed him that our floors had JUST been sanded and that we covered the hallway and the whole kitchen area floors with paper (voima paperi) and to please not step off of them…. Well…we come in after they have gone so we can put the floor stain (very nice choice by mira I might add) to give them a bit of color and then after that the 1st layer of sealant to protect them. So..we dutifully take off our shoes (outside the door) and put on nice socks and go in to remove the papers. We walk around, remove the paper, vacuum and tack cloth the entire fucking flat. Excuse my language… We scrubbed with a clean cloth and started the floor staining ritual. I am telling you it was like invisible frickin ink. The frickin idiots walked all over our living room area with work boots on. We now have foot prints everywhere. I can tell you that Monkey Boy wears a size 42….. Okay..don’t panic..don’t scream Steph…UGH!!! At this point we just don’t have 1.) Money (paying for 2 apartments and a renovation leaves me at this very moment with 38,23 euros in my bank until payday on the 15th, and 2). TIME. We had no option NOT to move at the end of January… So to all of my friends who suggested the resanding, I appreciate your suggestions, but there is no way in hell we can afford it...both in money, or another place to live while it is being done and the re-staining is accomplished….

..so..Steph’s Latin temper begins to boil and poor Mira listens to me rant and rave at the ceiling.. We call him. Well…it was Mira cause Monkey Boy don’t speaka da English and I don’t speak Finnish well enough when it comes to remodeling terms and I would just spend 10 minutes yelling: “VITTU SAATANA PERKELE!!!” at him and that would get us nowhere. MB says that “we needed to use the electrical outlet on the other side of the room…and we didn’t realize there was NOTHING protecting the floors”…. WHAT?!?! What the hell did we tell you earlier you frickin ASSHOLE!! OH and the outlet that was right next to you on the wall of the COVERED area wasn’t enough?!?!?... JESUS..Thanks for the interesting conversational piece that is now our living room floor. I will just have to say it was a game of Twister gone wrong?

Cabinets arrive and Monkey Boy starts to install them. Now..the installation of cabinets begins…and he says that it will take him 3 days… Half way through he runs out of tile (and we estimated a whole extra square meter so he wouldn’t) and we have to order another box so he can use 4. Yes 4. To top it off, the 4 he decides to use have black stuff on them that won’t come off!. Our tiles are installed, but the frickin grout was not wiped afterwards so it is all over the tiles in clumps. Not only that… the “chemical” wash he used to “treat” the tiles when they went on is now splashed over our newly painted LIVINGROOM wall ( a good 3 feet away), down the front of my brand new cabinets and inside my BRAND FUCKING NEW and REALLY EXPENSIVE STAINLESS STEEL GAS STOVE!!!!.... What does Monkey boy say when we call him: “It wasn’t me. I didn’t do it. The stuff was covered and the stove shouldn’t have been there in the first place.”….. WHAT?!??!?!!? FUCKING WHAT?!?!?!?! You mean to tell me that this intellectual giant never installed tile in a kitchen that had appliances in them before?!?!?! You have to be fucking kidding me!!! Not only that, when we are preparing the kitchen for our moving day, the fucking genius grouted the masking tape he used to attach the “covering” of the countertops TO the fucking counter-tops!!! It took 3 hours with needle-nosed pliers and a hell of a lot of patience for it to be taken off… Oh and did I mention the giant holes he punched in our walls to run the electricity and didn’t even ask us first?... That part isn’t so bad because they are now covered with face plates..but come on buddy..give me a fucking break! Oh..and he STILL hasn’t scilconed the gap between the tiles and the countertop so we have to be very careful about not having any kind of wetness (especially in the sink area) splash near it.

…so the kitchen is completely done yet, the bastard has to come back… We called Domus and they told us that we are not the only client that has complained about his workmanship and attitude. We were number 3. So we actually were told that they are severing their contract with him. It is just sad that we had to be the 3rd client that had this experience. We called the consumer protection agency to find out our rights ( I was threatening not to pay at all) and the woman there said that the only thing we can do is argue when we get the bill and that we have to have him finish the contract or HE could sue US. WHAT?!!??!?! So Monkey Boy comes tomorrow to attach the backboard for the island (the original one was 3mm too small) and the kick boards for 2 locations. He is also supposed to silicon the gap…. We have decided that he will NOT be allowed in our house without one of us there….

….there..the Kitchen rant….


…on the plus side, our Bathroom company (Blosius) did a great job. Expensive, but great. It is precisely what we asked for and finished on-time. The painter we had help us was also great…..so all in all it isn’t THAT bad, but I still want to kick Monkey Boy in the bits..many many times.

Suckage and Shaweet...

Suckage

• Not having enough hours in the day
• Remodeling at the same time as having HUGE deliverables due at work
• PM training course which I have to attend the 2nd session of
• ISEB material I have to sift through to pass an exam for a course my company is paying giagundo amounts of money to send me on which I don't have time for because of the huge mind-shattering deliverables at work
• Kitchen installation firms who are unbelievably arrogant and fuck up things that even a blind shaved monkey could do
• Packing AND Unpacking
• Not knowing where anything is and taking 30 fucking minutes to find a fucking pair of socks while tripping over boxes and stubbing my toes on furniture which is in unfamiliar places in an unfamilar place
• Bleeding money like a frickin stuck pig
• Only getting 4 hours of sleep a night because of remodeling and having to work crazy hours

Shaweet

• Not renting anymore and owning (again)
• Really cool friends who help unpack, put things away, clean etc..
• Only having to grunt a mono-syllabic answer and having it understood to be a 10 minute discourse on the universe and the meaning of life
• Sauna every Saturday from 16:00-17:00 because my building has one now
• Mira
• Suga letting me call her at all hours and bitch about remodeling in a foreign country
• K sending me very intimate questions and pointing out when I sidestep the answer..case study...right...
• The local pub is a 18 foot walk from the gate to my building's courtyard
• Presidential elecions are over and the chic won...

The last 2 weeks has been frickin hell. Between being so angry (not at each other) that we were both in tears, having to pack our entire flat while trying to get remodeling crap done, spending money like we have it to spend and work being insane, I am incredibly knackered (euro-trash word there for you Sug)and I am not so sure I am entirely lucid anymore. I have uttered the words "never again" before and did it this time...but this time I mean it.

This Friday is definitely a get blind drunk Friday. We have agreed. The local pub is so close to my apartment I am calling it my livingroom and I am going to make liberal use of it...now if it only had my comfy couch in it...

No niin...Huom: Osittain suomeksi..osittain englanniksi

Anzi, suomalainen ihminen, haastoi minut kertomaan viisi omituista tapaani. Tämä on oikein vaikea kysymys ja haaste. On tärkeää että olen rehellinen. Kaikki jotka lukevat tämän ovat varmoja että en ole Suomalainen. Mutta...Haluan yrittää kirjoittaa minun vastaukseni suomeksi Anzille... Kirjoitan englanniksi tämän jälkeen.

Mitä ovat viisi omituista tapaani...

1.) Olen samalainen kuin Anzi.... vessassa, vieraassakin sellaisessa, minun on ehdottomasti vaihdettava vessapaperirullan asentoa, mikäli paperi tulee alta eikä päältä..

2.) En voi käydä vessassa jos siellä on toinen ihminen sisällä. En pidä siitä kun toinen ihminen voi kuulla kun käyn vessassa.. olen ujo.

3.) En voi mennä kellarikerrokseen ilman toista ihmistä...Herra Jumala se on pelottavaa!!

4.) Kun syön omenaa...minä aina lisään sen päälle suolaa...Oikesti. Istun sohvalla ja toisessa kädessä on omena ja toisessa kädessä on suolaa...

5.)Olen suuri Barry Manilow-fani...

Okei..viimeinen juttu ei ole oikein "omituinen tapani"...mutta...


No niin Anzi...Oliko tämä mitä halusit tietää???? :)

_____________________________________________

Okay..so translation of the above:

Anzi, a Finnish person, challenged me to name 5 peculiar habits of mine. This is a really difficult question and challenge. It is important that I am honest. Everyone who reads this will be sure I am not a Fin. But, I want to try to write my answer in Finnish to Anzi. I'll write in English at the end.

What are my 5 peculiar habits:

1.) I am just like Anzii.. in the bathroom, if the toilet paperroll is the wrong way, I absolutely have to change the position so the paper comes from the top of the roll and not behind it.


2.) I can't use the bathroom if someone else is in there. I don't like it when someone else can hear when I use the bathroom..I am shy

3.)I can't go to the cellar/basement without someone else. Good God it is scary..

4.)When I eat an apple..I always put salt on it. Really. I sit on the sofa and in one hand is the apple and in the other hand is salt.

5.)I am a big Barry Manilow fan.

Okay the last one isn't really a "peculiar habit"...but...


So Anzi, is this what you wanted to know?

Know what time it is?

Right...so I have taken a few days off of blogging because of being intensely and painfully busy at work; not to mention the remodel project...which is STILL going on...

Today I went blog surfing through my friends' blogs and discovered:
1.) Melanie lives vicariously though mine and Mira's livers.
2.) Kristin is presently avoiding rolling in dead chickens
3.) Sarah has a job were people wake her up multiple times a night...
4.) John doesn't post stuff to his blog for long periods of time and neither does Duane.

I also discovered that, whilst some would think of my drunken antics as insanely annoying and downright juvenile, my friends (and people I don't know who are listening in) seem to find my drunken phone calls in the middle of the Finnish night amusing... Who knew?! Seriously...I have this horrible habit...Okay WE have this horrible habit (aside from smoking) of having that 1 extra drink that puts over the "sensible and mature" behavior line and sends us at breakneck metabolism speed, reserved soley for alcoholic beverages, directly to making drunken phone calls across oceans, continents and time zones to those we love. Sarah even gave me her number after one drunken email to her explaining that I was drunk and wanted to call her but couldn't find her mobile number... The silly girl actually replied and GAVE it to me :) Ya get what ya give I say...

I am wondering if I should invest in this (from Geek.com):

"The folks at Virgin Mobile of Australia seem to be thinking outside the box. Just in time for the holiday season and its numerous parties, a new service will be provided by the wireless company that will prevent embarrassing late-night drunken phone calls. This seems to be quite a problem, considering the company surveyed 409 people and found that 95% of them have made drunken phone calls. Wireless customers will now be able to save themselves by dialing 333 then entering a number they would like to be blocked from calling. For US$0.25 that number will be blocked until 6 A.M. the following day. Now if a wireless company could only prevent you from hitting on your boss's wife at the company Christmas party and take your keys when your cellphone detects you've had too much to drink, it'd really be offering the holiday drunk a true suite of services."

..on second thought...Nahhhh....I like calling Kristin and telling her that I am drinking a lovely drink and she needs to go to work...I like calling Sarah and babbling about Mira eating carrots (not very "drunk" food I know Sarah..but hey..it was all that was worth eating in the house..and she LIKES carrots...ick), or Melanie and telling her that she is awesome and that I am drunk... and Beth...Oh poor Beth.. That woman gets calls from me at all frickin hours and random babble comes out of my mouth..and she puts up with it and still gives SUGA..

My friends ROCK ..seriously...

In case anyone was interested, my birthday was great...except for the throwing up part... Must have been something I ate.. Seriously. No joke. We went out for a lovely dinner... I had 2 glasses of wine and a fabulous asian fusion spicey noodle beef thinger to eat..it was yummy. Until about 10:12..when it came right back up. I have no idea why..

Oh..and also born on the same day as me (aside from Pepi..a friend's daughter who just turned 2)... :

1909 Ethel Merman, U.S. singer and actress, the "Queen of Broadway."

..might explain some cosmic reason for my big frickin mouth and loud voice...

Ah..Nostalgia

Okay my friend Hale is feeling old. She isn't even 30 yet and she is feeling that way (read her post on her blog to find out why). We had a discussion (which she references in her post) once about 80's movies. I was in High School (Lukio for you Finns) in the 80's. Beth was in Uni. Yeah she is older than I am, but as she will always point out: "It's not the age honey it is the milage." She is right btw..it is all about the milage.

Anywho, with my birthday fast approaching and after reading Hale's post, I have started thinking about our conversation regarding 80's movies... I remember going to see Purple Rain and being mesmerized by Prince up on the screen.. What young adult in the 80's doesn't remember: The Breakfast Club, About Last Night, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Say Anything, Footloose, The Outsiders, Goonies, Better Off Dead, The Princess Bride, Some Kind of Wonderful... And for those of us who were into a more sophisticated fare: Against All Odds, The Accused, Amadeus, Blue Velvet, The Color Purple...and yes Steel Magnolias..

These are classics folks...seriously. Some of the best lines ever are from 80's movies...

"..say hello to my lill friend" - Al Pacino, "Scarface" - as Tony Montana
"..Demented and sad...but social" - The Breakfast Club
"Anyone..anyone..Bueller..Beuller" - Ferris Beuller's Day Off -
"You used to be fun. You used to be warped and twisted and hilarious... and I mean that in the best way - I mean it as a compliment! "- John Cusak - Say Anything -as Lloyd Dobler

"As you wish" - The Princess Bride
"We'll never make it.." Goonies
"2 dollars..I want my 2 dollars".. Better Off Dead

....One of my favorite exchanges in a movie ever!:
Clairee: *Here*!
[Grabs Ouiser by the shoulder and positions her in front of M'Lynn]
Clairee: *Hit this*! Go ahead M'Lynn, *slap her*!
Ouiser Boudreaux: [Taken aback and confused] Are you crazy?
Clairee: *Hit her*!
Ouiser Boudreaux: *Are you high, Clairee*?
Truvy: [In a frightened tone] Clairee, have you lost your mind?
Clairee: We'll sell t-shirts sayin' "I SLAPPED OUISER BOUDREAUX!" Hit her!
Annelle: [in a scared tone] Ms. Clairee, enoough!
Clairee: Ouiser, this is your chance to do something for your fellow man! Knock her lights out, M'Lynn!
Ouiser Boudreaux: [snatches away] Let go o' me!
Clairee: M'LYNN, YOU JUST MISSED THE CHANCE OF A LIFETIME! HALF O' CHIQUAPIN PARISH'LL GIVE THEIR EYE-TEETH TO TAKE A WHACK O' OUISER!

...ah...nostalgia... Warning to all of you who don't know this: Upon being in the same location for more than 10 mintues, K, Mel, Michael and I can go through almost the entire script of Steel Magnolias... Well to US it is amusing..and We ARE *THAT* funny!!!!!

My friends...

..are frickin hilarious. I think that they call me just to torture me. Today K decided to call me from an Irish bar in Seattle with John, Patricia and her husband Duane... They called because they were just about to have a Car Bomb and wanted to rub it in and figured if it was time for them to drink in the middle of the night half way around the world then it was time for me to get up for work (I was already there)... A car bomb...Ahhh the memories of Portugal with D and K...

Situation: D and K's honeymoon..in Portugal..I was there...(don't ask)..We went to an Irish bar and K was telling me about this drink...so I asked the Irish Bartendress if she knew how to make a "car bomb"...bad call I know...much maligning my intelligence (not by the bartendress but by my friends) ensued. Sooooo...I am of the firm belief that the bartender was sooo gay and soooo into me... the response I received from D and K that night..was sent again in a text message to me today: "You see gay people everywhere"...... WELL DUHHH!!!! We ARE everywhere!

THen I remember Pride in Tampere last year...OOOPS...I couldn't remember how to order one and the version I told the bartender to make would make ANYONE Hurl...

So..in case you were wondering.
Irish Car Bomb:
- 1/2 pint(s) Guinness Beer
- 1/2 oz Bailey's Irish Cream
- 1/2 oz Irish Whiskey

Finally!!!!

For those of you who don't know this..I am definitely NOT a morning person. I hate waking up, I hate getting out of bed, I am always cold and I am always whiney in the mornings. Seriously..I can't stand chipper people in the morning..they make my head hurt and my skin crawl. I have always been very honest about my lack of humor and down right groggyness in the morning...well now I know why.

Study: Waking up like being drunk
Wednesday, January 11, 2006;
Posted: 4:11 a.m. EST (09:11 GMT)

CHICAGO, Illinois (Reuters) -- If it takes a while to clear the cobwebs after waking up, that's understandable -- "sleep inertia" leaves some people so groggy they might as well be drunk, researchers said on Tuesday.

"For a short period, at least, the effects of sleep inertia may be as bad as or worse than being legally drunk," said researcher Kenneth Wright of the University of Colorado at Boulder.

That befuddled feeling usually lasts for at least a few minutes but may be detectable for up to two hours, Wright wrote in a report published in this week's issue of the Journal of the American Medical Association.

The findings are relevant to emergency workers such as firefighters, or for truck drivers and resident doctors who must spring into action after awakening from naps. A groggy driver is accident-prone, and a hazy doctor might make a mistake calculating a drug dosage, the report said.

Wright's study of 16 subjects found the most severe impairments were evident on performance tests taken during the first three minutes after awakening from an eight-hour sleep.

"We found the cognitive skills of test subjects were worse upon awakening than after extended sleep deprivation," he said.

There is evidence that the cortical areas of the brain thought to be responsible for problem-solving, complex thought and emotions take longer to wake up than other parts of the brain, Wright wrote.

...um...

FORT SUMNER, New Mexico (AP) -- A mouse got its revenge against a homeowner who tried to dispose of it in a pile of burning leaves. The blazing creature ran back to the man's house and set it on fire.

Luciano Mares, 81, of Fort Sumner said he caught the mouse inside his house and wanted to get rid of it.

"I had some leaves burning outside, so I threw it in the fire, and the mouse was on fire and ran back at the house," Mares said from a motel room Saturday.

Village Fire Chief Juan Chavez said the burning mouse ran to just beneath a window, and the flames spread up from there and throughout the house.

No was hurt inside, but the home and everything in it was destroyed.

Unseasonably dry and windy conditions have charred more than 53,000 acres and destroyed 10 homes in southeastern New Mexico in recent weeks.

"I've seen numerous house fires," village Fire Department Capt. Jim Lyssy said, "but nothing as unique as this one."


Score one for the little guys...but the poor 81 year old guy now has no home...let's just hope for an up to date home owner's insurance policy...

Jesus H. Christ on a Pogo stick

This cold is kicking my tail feathers... I sound like this guy!




...seriously...

and for those of you who DON'T know who he is. His name is Harvey Fierstein and he has a voice which makes gravel sound musical...

UGH!!!

Yeah yeah yeah.. I know I know

I know...it has been a while since posting and you are all sad that I haven't posted in a while...Well I was in the States for the whirlwind trip to see the family for the Christmas holiday (5 days of my family and no privacy).... It was actually greaat to see everyone, but I was so tired of not having my own space after 4 days I couldn't wait to get back on the plane home to Helsinki... The topper of the trip was lunch on the day we left to come home. Yes folks I ate 2 boiled lobsters at lunch. You read that correctly..2. And they were glorious!

New Year's celebrations were low key with Hale and the gang...thanks to a killer head cold (thanks Rodge you bastard) I was not really in the celebratory mood. All I wanted was some tea and my comfy pj's and my bed...

On a funny note, I was browsing my friend's blog and he mentioned this website that allows you to see which celebrity you resemble most. You can upload several different photos of yourself (no they don't keep them) and see which celeb you look like in that photo. The ruling was that I either look like:


or:

-

Now..I have nothing against looking like Annette Bening, but Ariel Sharon?!?! I look like an old fat jewish guy??!?! WOW...

Beth will say I look like:



and she will also regale me with strains of "Jessie's Girl" warbled until I scream "FOR THE LOVE OF PETE!!! STOP!!!"

So...there you have it..I resemble either an activist Actress, an 80's pop/soap opera icon or an old fat jewish guy...

sometims...

Sometimes I just like to remind myself of the liberties I have as a US citizen and how I really enjoy them...

From the AP:
By SUZAN FRASER Associated Press Writer
© 2005 The
Associated Press

"ISTANBUL, Turkey — The presiding judge halted the trial
of Turkey's best-known novelist Friday, saying the court would need the approval
of the Justice Ministry for the trial to proceed.

Orhan Pamuk is accused
of insulting Turkey's national identity, a free speech case that has divided the
nation.

He faces up to three years in prison for saying to a Swiss
newspaper in February that Turkey is unwilling to deal with painful episodes in
its treatment of the country's Armenian minority or its continuing problems with
its 12 million Kurdish citizens.



Turkish novelist's trial halted
The trial of Turkish novelist Orhan Pamuk, charged with insulting the
national identity, was halted when the judge said the court would need the
approval of the Justice Ministry to proceed.

The case has led to
widespread criticism from the European Union, and the case is seen as a test of
Turkey's commitment to European standards of free speech. ......"

See, I can sit here and say: THE US SUCKS WITH RACIAL EQUALITY AND HUMAN RIGHTS!. or GEORGE BUSH IS ONE CHROMOSOME AWAY FROM AN ORANGUTAN ..(although I think that is actually insulting the orangutan).. And not have to go to jail or to trial for "insulting the national identity"... Gotta love the 1st Ammendment :)

How can Turkey hope to join the EU when it will not even discuss the horrible dark periods of it's history? The US can not progress until it addresses it's deep seeded racial inequality and backwards thinking when it comes to human rights, or it's open and (even worse) hidden descrimination against gays and lesbians and neither can Turkey progress unless it recognizes the mistakes it has made specifically with respect to genocide, women's rights, treatment of gays etc.

Who knew...

Okay..so I find these assessment things based on your birthday or name or what kind of ceral you eat incredibly funny. Below is what MY birthday supposedly means.

Your Birthdate: Not Tellin (although I did put it in for the thing)

You're incredibly introverted and introspective. You live inside your head. Oh so true don't you think? MUHAHAHAHAH You spend a lot of alone time meditating and thinking. 10 people in Italy..'nough said People see you as withdrawn, and at times they are right. Withdrawn?!?! People can't get me to shut up! 4 words folks: "Bring it home Steph!" You are caring and deep, but it may be difficult for you to show this side of yourself. Okay caring and deep yes... difficult to show it? I cry at frickin Hallmark commercials for christ's sake!! Your strength: Your original approach to thinking Oh yeah..I am an original alright.. Your weakness: You tend to shy away from others In which universe? Your power color: Pale blue Not since 1979 honey! Your power symbol: Wavy line um...er...whatever.. Your power month: July I live in Finland..of COURSE July is my power month..the sun barely frickin sets during that month!

These things are a HOOT!

Pretty soon I get to see this guy


Oh..yeah..and my family... :) I have the world's most rockinest 87 year old grams... isn't she great?!!

Officially...

Officially according to me Kristin Thomas shall now be known as the venerable Kristin "I am smarter than those silly people in white lab coats" Thomas a.k.a Dr. K. I have visited the very nice IwentToMedicalSchoolSoIShouldKnowWhatYouHave person at the hospital today to get the results of my bone marrow test. It turns out (and I have an officially signed paper to prove it) that I should have listened to K all along. I am certified as a Freak. I am an exception to the rule of white blood cell counts. The standard deviation of a white blood cell count is + or - 2% in the general population. Meaning at least 2 % of the population is either above or below the standard "acceptable" range when it comes to your white blood cells.

My Dr. confirmed to me today what K has said all along: "You have lesbian cooties and are a freak." It is true. My Dr (all Harvard edgumakayted and crap) told me that I am the execption even to the standard deviation rule. My white blood cell count is just, for me, normally and genetically twice that of everyone else. I am 100% healthy...and a freak of nature.

I should have listend to K in the first place. Then I wouldn't have had to have steel instruments stuck into my bones, x-rays, ultra sounds, blood tests galore and I wouldn't have had to travel to a bazillion doctor's appointments.

oooooohhhh I have cooties!!!!

Gotta Love Hypocracy

Okay..my little activist side is all in a huff right now. I am all about to whip out the big gaigundo rainbow flag, pink triangles, drag kings, gender-bending friends, gay priests...anyone I can find.

For those of you who don't know, I am a supporter in the fight against Breast Cancer. My very dear friend K is a breast cancer survivor (ROCK ON K!!) and I have known several women in my life with breast cancer. You, who know me, also know I have a real love of the music of Melissa Etheridge (yes I play softball, wear flannel occasionaly, own power tools and can open any damned jar without the help of a guy). Now, Ms. Etheridge has been an out and proud musician with over 25 Million albums sold world-wide. She is also a breast cancer survivor. Her battle with the disease was one that was open and not hidden - just like everything else in her life. So was Kristin's. Two very strong women from different socio-economic backgrounds, different careers, different friends, different cricles but with 2 things in common - both women, both with breast cancer. Okay, K isn't THAT different. She isn't gay, but let's face it, when your bridal party at your wedding included 2 lesbians and a gay man, you aren't a closed minded person. Just the opposite. K is one of the strongest women I know. That woman had side affects from Chemo that NO ONE should ever go through.. She was bald, sick, throwing up, tired, sad, exhausted emotionally ...the list can go on. Chemo, from all accounts, kicks the ever loving shit out of you.

Fast Forward - Grammy's 2005 - Ms. Etheridge performs a tribute to Janise Joplin after just having finished her last chemo treatment - bald as anything. Her hair was a big thing in her image and she admitted at first she was a bit concerned people would make fun of her, aside from being exhausted from chemo. Well..she decided to do it anyway because she never hid before and wouldn't hide now. Her performance was talked about around the world as inspiring and courageous. She received letters and comments from women all around the world, walks of life and stages of cancer stating what an inspiration she was to them to continue their fight - that if a 42 year old woman bald from chemo can perform in front of millions of people then they will not be ashamed of their baldness or be afraid to talk about their disease.

SO inspirational was her openly public battle with breast cancer that a major auto manufacturer approached her. Ford approached Melissa in 2005 about recording a single to serve as an anthem for the fight against breast cancer. The result, I Run for Life, is a song written and performed by Melissa that describes her own experience with the disease and also the experiences of every woman who has ever been touched by breast cancer. Ford, on their website describes her as:

" Grammy®Award winner, wife, and mother, Melissa Etheridge, knows just how
breast cancer can threaten our most precious human relationships. She also knows
how it endangers the most precious human relationship of all—the one we have
with ourselves. Diagnosed with breast cancer in late 2004, today she is
cancer-free. Hers is a success story. She fought breast cancer with all she had.
And, she won..."

So what does Ford do?!?!?!?

DETROIT - Ford Motor Co. said on Tuesday that its luxury Jaguar and Land Rover brands will no longer advertise in gay publications,...

Ford’s move came nearly a week after the Tupelo, Miss.-based American Family Association canceled a boycott of Ford vehicles that began in May, when the group criticized Ford for being too gay-friendly.

“We are ending the boycott of Ford,” association Chairman Donald Wildmon said in a statement Wednesday on the group’s Web site. “While we still have a few differences with Ford, we feel that our concerns are being addressed in good faith and will continue to be addressed in the future.”

You ask an out and proud Lesbian who is a breast cancer survivor to write a song to show how much Ford cares about women's health, said artist contributes ALL of the royalties from that song to Breast Cancer Research and then you turn around and stop advertising in Gay magazines because the conservative Christian right threatens to boycott your product?!?!? You hypocritical bastards.

I know people will say: " It was a business decision." MY BIG FAT ASS it was. Pure and simple they caved. The gay community should stand up and be noticed in this. Gay market reports that 78 percent of gay online users prefer to buy from companies that advertise to the gay market. More affluent. The gay and lesbian market is perhaps the most affluent and loyal affinity group of all. More discretionary income. The average middle-class family spends over one million dollars to raise a child through age 22. Some gay people have kids. Most don't. Where are they spending that money? EVERYWHERE.... Take a look at THIS list FORD.. Seriously people...

Research shows that gay consumers are...

Over twice as likely as national index to be professionals or managers

Average household income over $85.4K

Are 3.4 times more likely to have household income over $250K

The 2000 Census showed gay men and lesbians living with partners in 99.3 percent of all U.S. counties

Research shows 9 percent of urban populations are gay and lesbian

Twice as likely to have graduated from college

Gay men and lesbians go out more, buy more, have more disposable income and are extremely loyal consumers

Gay and lesbian consumers purchase from companies/brands that advertise in gay media, deliver product messages in gay-specific advertising, support gay and lesbian community causes and are good to their own gay and lesbian employees

Four times as likely to spend over $150 on long distance monthly

Twice as likely to spend $250 on cellular service
Over 90 percent took a domestic trip this year

60 percent took a foreign trip in the last three years

65 percent identify themselves as having to have the "latest"

68 percent upgrade to a product's latest model

77 percent "believe in indulging in themselves"

57 percent "prefer to buy top of the line"

59 percent buy themselves whatever they want

I say hit Ford where it counts. In the WALLET.

At the behest of Sug

Okay here it is. In a conversation with my best friend the other day (gotta love a 10 hour and 30 degree F difference), we were discussing my blog. I know she reads it because she gives amusing and insightful comments. Okay not so insightful, we save those for actual voice conversations. As most of you know, I have the utmost respect for my Sug (aka Beth Martin) and we will discuss anything from religion to politics to the weather. I asked if she had read my post on the whole Vatican decree about gays in the priesthood and she had mentioned that she didn't want to offend anyone so she didn't put a comment. ..don't worry I told her she was being dumb. She then asked if I had followed the stories about the civil unrest in France. Okay Riots. Plain and simple riots. And I told her I had, but had refrained from commenting on them because...because....well..I don't know precisely why....which is when I promptly called MYSELF dumb. SO at the behest of SUG here goes.

The Riots in France
by: Me

Lots of people got mad and burned stuff. The end.

Just joking. Okay one of the things that I am in some perverse way happy about, is that these riots took place in France. Let me go on the record as saying Riots are never a good thing. Innocent people get hurt and in some cases killed; property gets damaged and lots of businesses, who otherwise were harmless and serve the community, get destroyed. Now that the disclaimer is done with. I am pleased that situations with horrible racial and economic inequality which result in unmitigated violence happen in countries other than the US as well. Seriously folks. I live in Europe. My mom is Portuguese and my Dad is French. The country that seems to think it has the greatest social system in the world just had 20 days of terror and bloodshed due to the economic and racial divide that exists between people of color (in this case also immigrants and muslim) and the white majority during the month of November. As many of you know, I am not usually the one to wave the American Flag around and shout from the roof tops about how great the US is. The US is a great country in many respects but also has a long way to go in others. HOWEVER, sometimes it gets my little ackadack (Sug's word for my portuguese heritage) blood boiling to so often be exposed to outright anti-American sentiment and hatred. I can not tell you how many times I have listened to the Anti-American-Bigger-Bully-Stupid President-War Mongering Bastards speech and politely turned the other way. Now it is time to say: Hey, we aren't the only country with racial and economic problems!


Well Mr Chirac, how about you look to your own country with it's 8973 vehicles burned and it's 2888 arrests! The inhabitants of the French suburbs (banlieue) suffer from unemployment at a much higher level than that of the rest of France. And according to data gathered by the BBC unemployment of people of foreign origin is 1.5 times higher than that of people of French origin, after adjusting for educational qualifications. An unemployment rate of 5% for French university graduates can be compared to the unemployment rate of 26.5% for university graduates of north African origin. Racial and religious discrimination against persons with dark skin or Muslim-sounding names has been cited as a major cause of unhappiness in the areas affected.

...see the US isn't the only country with problems.... I am not going to sit here and say I support the war in Iraq. I don't. I am not going to sit here and say that there isn't a problem with racisim in the US. There is. I am not going to sit here and say that there isn't a huge economic gap between white and black in the US. There is. I am not going to say that there isn't a problem with religious intolerance (ironic considering the 1st ammendment) in the US. There is. But I am going to sit here and say: No country is perfect so quit bashing the US all the time.

uh-oh..maybe I should get 2?

For those of you who don't know, I have a deadly allergy to nuts. I was surfing MSNBC today and oh my. Some people don't get it..they think..allergy=pop a claritin or allegra and you will be fine.


Maybe I should get another epi-pen?

"SAGUENAY, Quebec - A 15-year-old girl with a peanut allergy died after
kissing her boyfriend, who had just eaten a peanut butter snack, hospital
officials said Monday.

Christina Desforges died in a Quebec hospital
Wednesday after doctors were unable to treat her allergic reaction to the kiss
the previous weekend.

Desforges, who lived in Saguenay, about 155 miles north
of Quebec City, was almost immediately given a shot of adrenaline, a standard
tool for treating the anaphylactic shock brought on by a peanut allergy,
officials said...."

Damn you Paul Simon!!

Okay..strange title I know. But all that was going through my head today was Simon and Garfunkle's "Sound of Silence". It was kind of ironic actually. Okay morbid. If you have been reading this blog for a while, you know about the upteenmillion doctor's I have had to go see and the bazillion tests I have had to figure out why the hell my white blood cell count is over 100% higher than it should be. Yep, you guessed it..I had another test today. Let me just say that at least this internal specialist was honest with me when she said "This will hurt." No sugar coated "you may experience mild discomfort" crap. When a doctor says "you may experience mild discomfort", they mean pain. Plain and simple...pain.

...so back to Morbid. The test I had was a bone marrow test. The doctor who is treating me speaks English beautifully, but she wanted me to be sure I understood the test, so she asked me to look it up and make sure her description matched the one I found. Gotta love WebMD : "A bone marrow biopsy uses a special tool that twists into the bone. You may feel pressure at the site and hear a crunching sound as the tool twists into the bone " CRUNCHING?!?!?! CRUNCHING?!?! What the fuck!!?! (pardon my language). Not only that...I get the extra special: "In rare cases, a fluid sample is removed from the breastbone.."

And then I see this part about possible Risks: "Injury to your heart, a lung, or a major blood vessel if the sample is taken from the breastbone (sternum). However, most bone marrow samples are not taken from the breastbone, so this problem is not common. " - tell that to my sternum buddy!

Yes folks, they twisted a giant frickin pointy metal tube into my sternum this morning and then stuck a frickin long ass needle and pointy other thing and snipped and sucked out stuff that shouldn't be on the outside of ANYONE's body at any time. Not only that, the first sample wasn't enough..they had to do it TWICE! Lemme just tell ya..that shit don't tickle.

The whole time...I am hearing the crunching noise of my breastbone being drilled into fucking Paul Simon singing "..it's the sound...of Silence.." is going through my fucking head! This test hurt like a mo-fo and now I have this strange sensation of my sternum weighing MORE than it did before not to mention a nice hole in the middle of my chest. Doc says it's normal. Okay so was my Pulp Fiction-type nightmare -complete with John Travolta slamming one giagundo frickin needle in to my chest normal too?

...right...results on the 13th of December...

And to think I used to be a Catholic

This just in from CNN:

(CNN) -- In an eagerly awaited document, the Vatican has
reiterated its policy against gay priests, but has said it would allow those who
have "clearly overcome" homosexual tendencies to start the process of becoming a
priest.
In spelling out its position on Tuesday, the Vatican office that
deals with education within the Catholic Church made a distinction between
deep-seated homosexual tendencies and what it called "the expression of a
transitory problem."
"The Church, while profoundly respecting the persons in
question, cannot admit to the Seminary and to Holy Orders those who practice
homosexuality, present deeply rooted homosexual tendencies or support the
so-called gay culture," the document said.
But the document said when
"homosexual tendencies are only the expression of a transitory problem ... these
must be clearly overcome at least three years prior to diaconate
ordination." (see CNN for the complete article)

Okay.."overcome" homosexual tendencies....isn't that what the majority of gay priests have done? Those gay priests who keep their vow of celebacy have "overcome" right? They do not violate their vow, they do not have sex with other men, they preside over mass, hear confessions, perform sacraments, advise, comfort, listen....in other words they are a Priest! How can the Vatican honestly think that a priest who is gay and is keeping his vow of celebacy HASN'T "overcome". Straight priests "overcome" their heterosexual tendencies when they take the same vow for christ's sake! (pun intended). They can't take a gay man who has been sexually active (ie. practice homosexuality) but they can take a straight man who has been active but who also now hears the higher calling of God? The Church has always taught since the First Century of the 20th Century that homosexuality, aside from being a grave sin, is also "..an intrinsic disorder. A psychosexual disorder." So if we go along those thoughts, there are many priests with psychological disorders - depression. anxiety, complusion, bi-polar disorder - just to name a few, but they don't try to root out those individuals do they? I have priests in my family and while I have the greatest respect for their faith and dedication to their vocation, I personally don't really care if they are gay or straight. When a priest is ordained, he takes a vow of celebacy. How can a "psychosexual" disorder such as homosexuality even be relevant if the vow is upheld. Isn't it just as bad for a priest to violate his vow either way? Or is it more forgivable if he beds one of his female parishoners or better yet, Sister Mary Whatshername from the convent next door? Having sexual thoughts outside of wedlock is considered sinful in any form. Does the Vatican really think that the straight priests don't have a randy fantasy every now and again? Gimme a break.

Oh..and while I am at it..what the hell is a "transitory problem" as related to homosexuality? Seriously. I mean transitory...hmmm...does that mean transitioning from having sex with someone of the same gender to abstaining? Does it mean like, the visit to the gay bar on Friday was a transitory one so I am not really gay? I don't know any true homosexual, who identifies as a homosexual, that would ever say it is a "transitory" condition or problem. It isn't like they are gonna wake up in the morning tomorrow and say .. "Hmm..now I prefer women". Bi-sexuality is a different animal altogether. Does this tranistory problem mean that they transition from gay to straight and back again? Now, before you get all nasty with me, I know damned well what the definition of transitory is. I just can't believe the Church thinks being gay can be transitory. Of course I also can't believe the Church thinks that being gay is a choice.....

...oh yeah...sorry for not posting for a while...I have been hella busy.... So Hei to Hale and Mira, Suga to Sug, HI! to Sarah, Kristin, Mel, Duane, Laura, John, Patricia, Bryan (who I am sure doesn't read this), etc..etc... and so on...

My unpopular opinion?

From YLE the state news agency here in Finland:


Government Debates Fertility Rights Proposal
Published 09.11.2005, 09.49

The government begins grappling with its policies for fertility treatments on Wednesday. A controversial proposal by the Ministry of Justice would grant treatments to single women and lesbian couples, and make it easier to trace the identity of sperm and egg donors. The plan was written up by previous Justice Minister Johannes Koskinen, but is now being presented by his successor, Leena Luhtanen. After government ministers debate the proposal, it will be sent on to Parliament for consideration.The plan would allow married and single women, as well as lesbian couples, to seek state-sponsored fertility treatments and in-vitro fertilisation. The plan also loosens restrictions on the privacy of sperm and egg donors. If approved, the law would make it possible for people to find out the identity of their biological parents once they reached the age of 18. The government has been trying to put together some guidelines for fertility treatments off and on for the past 20 years. The previous attempt in 2003 failed over the question of whether sperm donors can be traced by their biological children.

Now, I am all for the right for women to try IVF and aritificial insemination no matter what their sexual orientation or marrital status is. What I am a bit concerned with is the privacy of the donor of the sperm. I am not so sure, if I were a guy (and thankfully I am not), that I would want an 18 year old popping up on my doorstep sayin "I am your child." .... It is a tough position to take, but I would vote for keeping the anonymous donor anonymous. I know it is probably an unpopular view, but if the child was conceived out of love and is raised knowing how he/she came into the world then I don't see how giving them the identity of the man who donated sperm is going to make a difference to them.

just sayin...

Dinner parties

Right, so I remember as a child when my parents would have a dinner party. They would be happy and the time was where their friends would arrive dressed up an looking sophisticated. My little green eyes would spy them from the bannister, women dressed in their skirts and sweater sets and their dates/husbands in crisply ironed white dress shirts and creases in their trousers so sharp they looked as though they could slice paper. Everyone looked so sophisticated with their gimlets and stingers...

Grown up me... Dinner parties are fun..but work... Especially if you are invited to a dinner party by new friends and all of a sudden you find yourself in the kitchen cooking the entire meal for 9 people! Isn't the answer to the polite query "Can I help you with anything?" "Not at all, have a glass of wine and relax. Have you met ".... ???????

Seriously..went to a dinner party..asked if there was anything I could do to "help" and the next thing I know I have prepared (chopping appropriate veggies included), Shitake Mushroom Soup, Steamed Veggies, Wild Rice and a lovely pan seared chicken with a spicey honey glaze...

My new friends are soooooo not good at the dinner party thing....

GRRRR

Okay..in an attempt to stop the spammers from posting how much they love my blog and I should check out their: real estate, single women, mortgage information, animal sitting, knitting etc etc blogs, I have turned on the comment verification feature of this thing... I know it may be inconvenient for all 6 of you who read my blog..but get over it..I am sick of spam

...now for a relaxing breakfast with Mira....TA!!

Mmmm mannequins

"The whole theme of the display was sadomasochistic and implied
lesbianism…I
felt like I was walking down a street in Amsterdam and watching the
prostitutes sitting in the windows trying to lure in customers. Victoria’s
Secret has pushed the envelope so far, where can they go next? Live sex acts
in
their windows? … We should not have to fear going shopping at a mall…”

--Traditional Values Coalition’s Executive Director Andrea Lafferty,
who,
armed with her camera, waged war on Victoria’s Secret at the Tyson’s
Corner Mall
in McLean, Virginia.

Shopping for underwear with Andrea Lafferty must be like having a root canal!

I don't get what she is so pissed about. A Victoria’s Secret window display, in which two mannequins are spooning in a bed, one mannequin is posed on its hands and knees as if crawling and one is tied up with ropes. Each mannequin is wearing the typical Victoria’s Secret fashion---gasp---unmentionables!!!

Unusual? Yes. But to wage a war on a store for a window display? In fact, I don’t know what’s more bizarre — “lesbian” mannequins slinky undergarments or Christian conservatives taking pictures of “lesbian” mannequins in slinky undergarments.

Next thing you know she will be jumping on that hysterically odd logic train that ultra conservatives seem to ride regularly and propose that "lesbian” mannequins who have “sex” with other “lesbian” mannequins will soon want to have “sex” with “animal” mannequins. Who knows...she may still do just that. Next stop Creepyville. It always amazes me how lesbians or gays getting married or as consenting adults are intimate privately behind closed doors in there home together always gets to the
"animals" stage. Seriously folks, and they say gay people are messed up?!?!?

How do you even determine if a mannequin is a lesbian? Is there a test of some sort that I don't know about?...

Feeling Philosophical

"Run for your life from any man who tells you that money is evil. That sentence is the leper's bell of an approaching looter. "

"So you think that money is the root of all evil. Have you ever asked what is the root of all money? "

- Ayn Rand -

Just cause..

Little Things

It is the little things that make me happy. I have now lived in Finland for almost 2 years. It was somewhat of a culture shock when I first moved, but nothing that sent me running for the next plane back to Beantown. Life is a journey and I have a philosophy that every day I should learn something. It doesn't matter if it is something small or big or about me or the world. Learning should never stop.

I learned something today. It is the little things at work that can make you feel good about your job and your ability to do it. In the States it is common to commend someone for a job well done. If they have performed well in a difficult or stressful situation, a simple "Good Job!", or "Thanks so much for your hard work, I appreciate it." From my experiences in Finland, not so much of that here. It is sort of expected that it is your job and you do it. Period. At the end of a successful project the team will most likely go out for beer or have a launch celebration, but individual compliments are hard to come by.

So ..my project from hell is proceeding and I had to give a 2 hour presentation today (complete with a snazzy powerpoint slide presentation, pivot tables, charts etc) - at the end of it, the Project Manager said "I had a feeling you knew what you were doing. Now I KNOW you do. I am very happy." - That is HUGE for me!

Suddenly I am not as stressed as I was before, even though I still have 346356 meetings a day and 3636456 things to get done. That simple little "I am happy." from my PM made a TON of my stress go away...

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....now time for a hot cocoa to celebrate...then back to the grind....

...did I mention it has snowed already here?...brrr....slippery ice covered sidewalks are scary at o'dark thirty in the morning...

..finding my "happy place"...

...okay. It is really hard to find my "happy place" right now. Work is absolute madness. I have 346356 meetings a day and 3636456 things to get done from said meetings, but no time to do it. Have I ever mentioned how much I HATE to be rushed?... holy mother of god this is frustrating... I feel like I have to hand hold everyone through the tasks which they are supposed to get done and if I don't do it the tasks WON'T get done....

I think some 80's music is in order on my headphones today and a big sign on the back of my chair that says "Cranky Pants. If you value living don't bother me."......

Mmm..Pasta

Ouch! My Liver! MIDNIGHT!! (long post folks)

So, I am back from a week in southern Italy. Sun, pasta, wine, scooters…did I mention past and wine..oh and more wine..and more wine..and more wine..and pasta..and a bit of wine. It was a week of laughter and fun. 8 Americans, 1 Canadian and a Finn all converged on the unsuspecting Hotel Residencia Le Terazze for a week of what turned out to be tons of fun.

Day 1
Mira and I arrived on Saturday afternoon and caught up with Brian and Pepe his disturbing South American accented alter ego. Poor Brian lost his camera, hadn’t slept for almost 2 days and had to endure ME all the way from the airport in Napoli to Sorrento. It was the full Planes, Trains and Automobiles experience. Let’s face it, I can’t be quiet. It is physically impossible for me. I have a mouth that just doesn’t shut up. Ever. After getting totally robbed by the Taxi driver – 42 freakin euro for a normally 23 euro taxi ride - (can you say little button next to the gear shift which adds 8 euros every time the little old bastid hit it surreptitiously while changing gears?) we arrived at the hotel. What do I find 2 terraces over from us? An energetic group of geriatrics from, of all places, New Frickin Hampshire! They heard my loud voice on the phone with my stepmom, who has the uncanny ability to bring out my latent Boston accent that I worked very hard to lose, and one little old lady decided to come over and say “Excuse me, but I heard an American accent.” They were very nice and were surprised to find that 6 out of the 8 Americans were all from New England at some point in their life. – spooky-

K, D, Mel, Laura, John, Patricia, and Sarah were all up the hill at the little village (Sant’ Agata) getting munchie stuff so we could all nosh and get reacquainted. Fast forward to dinner at the restaurant in the hotel next door (our’s didn’t really have one) and K has a brilliant plan..again. She buys 4 bottles of Cianti from the restaurant and we treck them back the 60 feet to our terrace. We proceed to crack em open and fun and hilarity ensued. It had been so long since we were all in one place (for those of us who knew each other previously) that we couldn’t stop cracking up. We had a blast. Opening our arms and hearts to the new ones (shout out to Sarah, Patricia and Brian) and it turns out they are as nuts, or even MORE nuts than we are in some cases! Happy happy joy joy it was great…up until… MIDNIGHT!!!! There is nothing that can prepare you for having an old man in his old-man jammies come storming out of his door and without preamble or any kind of nicety yell: “MIDNIGHT!! MIDNIGHT!!! “ at you. Okay..I can understand someone requesting that you keep it down cause they are trying to sleep, but JESUS..it was a SATURDAY night and the carriage had JUST turned back into the pumpkin fer chrissake. Needless to say we all mumbled “..um..sorry” like chastised children and decided to call it a night. Of course the giggling just got worse everytime one of us cranked out “MIDNIGHT!!!” in a stage whisper!... Good times…

Sorrento is a beautiful place. Really. One thing though. The drivers of the cars are nuts, but the scooter drivers are worse. Seriously. I knew that Italy had some scooter action going on, but WOW. Freaky. Dad’s with their little 5 year olds in front of them zooming through traffic missing car bumpers by mere inches… I think they teach them early. Mira and I had contemplated renting a scooter while there before we arrived…after arriving and SEEING how they drove..NO FRICKIN WAY!!!

Days 2-6
Because I am horrible at remembering exactly which day we did what…here goes:
Ristorante Museo Caruso
- This restaurant was so yummie that we went there twice despite the cost. The entire restaurant is dedicated to the famous opera singer from Naples, Enrico Caruso. It is (as the name says) a beautiful museum dedicated to the memory of the opera singer and his love for good food. The atmosphere is decidedly upscale and the service is wonderful. Gotta give MAD props to Reno! Reno was the waiter from heaven. What a guy! Funny and incredibly accommodating. He recommended a local wine that was fabulous on our first visit! The second visit was decided to be our “dress up” event – which Mira said for her meant shoes and socks. John recommended we book a chef’s table and let the chef have at it. What a great decision. DUDE..it was AWESOME. D and K were incredibly generous and wouldn’t let any of us pay. Duane said it is a tradition in the UK that when someone invites you out for a birthday dinner that THEY pay. I am very grateful for their generosity…although it probably means they won’t be able to eat for a month in the UK!...

…Back to the Hotel and more booze…and a drunken call to Sug (you knew it was coming)

Capri
- … the island of Capri is lovely. We took the ferry over and decided to take a boat tour around the island so we could see La Grotta Azzurra (The Blue Grotto). HOLY HELL was there some CHOP on the Med THAT day. I thought I was gonna toss! There was some serious nausea all around from the trip out to the Grotto. Anywho..the Grotto: It was “discovered” in 1826 by a German writer (August Kopisch). It is a natural cave and the magic of it is that sunglight, passing through an underwater cavity and shining through the water creates a blue reflection that illuminates the cavern. Breathtaking. To get into it, the big boat we took to the cave moors outside and these men in little row boats row up and help you down to their boat and you sit on the bottom of it. There are usually a max of 4 people in the boat with the “driver”. When he gets to the opening he tells you to duck – trust me he means it – and then pulls the boat via a chain anchored to the wall through the opening. The rock of the opening passes within about 6 inches of your head..creepy! Once inside, they row you around and when the boat turns you see the reflection. It is gorgeous. The whole time the drivers are sining opera. Lemme tell ya, there is nothing like it… Of course the drivers foot that ended up in Sarah’s “area” was an unexpected feature of the trip for her…

…The Gardens of Augustus – Mira’s work mate mentioned that we MUST go to the gardens if we want to see an absolutely beautiful view. She was right. Gorgeous. We have some amazing photos. The flowers were just beautiful and everything was so peaceful. The group ended up having a foto taken of us by a very nice lady (American) who was so patient. And funny. She made sure at least most of us had a photo of the group. Gotta hand it to that lady – she was able to figure out multiple digital cameras AND Sarah’s actual film camera (seriously.this camera is so old I expected an archeologist explination to accompany it).

…back upup (aka hotel) more booze

“Girls Day” – aka lazy day
K, Sarah, Mra and I decided to laze about one day while everyone else went downdowndown (aka Sorrento). We lounged by the pool and tried to recover from our hangovers…We read a bit and at about 3 decided to head upupup (aka Sant’Agata) for some lunch. Can you say 2 hours to get food? We were some seriously cranky women by the time our food arrived. The temperature also dropped at the village and being in shorts, sandals and various very light clothing (not gonna give you the low down on all our outfits..that would be way too girly for me) we hopped in a taxi back down.

…later dinner..and …um..more booze…

Shopping and the Marina
- we ambled through the shopping area and looked at the goods for sale…some interesting stuff there… like a WINE shop! Mmmm…wine…

…later…dinner and um…more booze…

Pompei
- The one thing that the Hotel manager guy actually got right..was his private guide for us for Pompei. Raefaelle (totally butchering the spelling). He was GREAT. He took all 10 of us on a 2 ½ hour tour of the ruins of Pompei and gave us a great history lesson. Very nice man! He was so worth the 100 euros for the 2 ½ hours…really..rockin. Pompei is a really great archeological site and if you ever have a chance to see it..GO! Some of the group wanted to see Vesuvius, but unfortunately the weather was way too cloudy for it. – sad. I have seen a volcano (an actual active one) and I was hoping that they could see it.

….right…more booze…

Summary
It was a great trip and we met some new people who are now counted as friends. I know I left a TON out of this ..but hey..my fingers are tried from typing…. Interesting note: the 49 Things may officially be 50. Sug has the final say, but it is nice to know that “IT” is an actual mute button… :)

Alcohol and emotion

Right, so the other night I was out with Mira and we had dinner..and a few drinks. So drinks turned into more drinks..and before I knew it I was a bit tipsy. I think we were preparing our livers for Italy. Anywhozamawhatzit..discussions turned to "Who do you turn to (partner's, husbands, wives..etc excluded) when you really need to talk or just wanna hang out without having to say much." Long topic I know, but after many drinks, condensed conversation is not even remotely possible. I don't think she even finished the question before I answered it. I am not trying to disrespect my other very close friends, but let's face it: Most people have a friend that they can tell anything to. That friend that can know what you are thinking just by looking at you..and sometimes they don't even have to do that. So close that you almost share a brain. You know the type. That friend that puts up with your moody crappy attitude when you are tired and hungry. That friend that will not tell you how much they are not fond of your current S.O until AFTER you break up. That friend that you can call at 3AM..broken down on the side of the road 100 miles away and they will come get you. The one who you can show up on their doorstep and with just a glance and no questions asked they know that you just need to "be" and they hand you a drink without pushing the subject. The friend who will look at you and say "You are being a complete bitch."...and coming from them you know it is true.

The friend who no matter how long it has been since you last spoke..when you call or they call..it is like you just finished a conversation 5 minutes ago and are picking up from where you left off before the stupid call waiting beeped in... That friend that you will drive 70 miles each way several times a week to feed their cats and clean the litter boxes cause they are on vacation. That same friend who you will totally forget to pick up at the airport because you are too stupid to put the return flight information on the CORRECT day in your calendar thus resulting in said friend and spouse spending ungodly amounts of money on a taxi home from the airport to an entirely different state, and they STILL talk to you.....

Hours and hours of laughing so hard you almost pull a muscle...The friend who will honestly look at you and say: Yes that DOES make you look fat... I don't think I have to keep going...

Anyway..so I looked at Mira and without even thinking about it "Sug" came out of my mouth.

Totally serious. Sug is that friend.

Nothin but love for you SUG.... and incase anyone was curious..her actual name is Beth...and even though I live 7,000 miles away from her right now..she is still my best friend and I wouldn't have it any other way.

...wow..I am way too mushy...

hmmm...

Have you ever had that moment where something is said at just the right time and in the right way that you start laughing...and can't stop. Everytime you try to stop, a new fit of giggles wracks your body. You laugh so hard your stomache muscles ache, you can't breathe, tears come streaming from your eyes...

...well if you haven't then you are missing out on a great thing. It happened to me this weekend. I laughed so hard I cried. My stomache hurt, my cheeks hurt from laughing so long and so hard. It was so liberating...

...try it sometime....

....one line did it..."...that's not Nancy..."

Fusche 2:15

A reading from the Book of Fusche (ardent follower of the FSM) Chapter 2, verse 15:

And it was decreed if thou hast need of drawing of the blood thou must seek the
ministrations of the mystical metal implement which shall be wielded by those
adept and trained in its use. Thou must not subject thyself to charlatans posing
as an Adept in the vestments of the mystical white lab coat. If thou dost do so,
thou whilst be set upon by darkening of thy skin in those areas where the vile
impostor hath, as such, jabbed thine formerly pristine area. Ye shall suffer
great discomfort and agitation; bringing about great bitching and moaning which
shall fall upon thine companions ears much like the sound of one's fingernails
being draggeth upon a chalkboard. So go forth ye to the true Adept for thine
drawing of the blood. Ye shall know them by the mystical name of: Phlebotomist.
Cleanly and precisely shall this Adept place the mystical metal implement to
thine skin drawing forth many vials of thine valuable life force leaving not a
blemish to mark its passing."

One needle, one phlebotomist, 3 minutes, 5 vials of blood, no bruising. All praise to the FSM.

Now I can relax for my trip to Italy.

:)

Tom Delay - indicted
Judith Miller - singing the truth about Mr. Cheney's chief of staff
CT Civil Unions - same rights, different word..are gays now "civilized"?

Just wanted to share the happiness..

:)

brain...dead...must...revive

Okay..so I have been brain dead and hella busy lately. Sue me.

Between looking for a flat to buy (holy hell there are some real dumps out there), visiting the dentist twice for fillings, 439064 meetings a day, planning for Italy, visiting the bank and getting an education on how mortgages work here, fighting with the frickin IRS in the States (doesn't bode well I know) and social engagements I am down right over extended!...

Good news: Kristin arrived safe in India. At least I hope so. A blog entry showed up on her blog so I am going to assume it wasn't a random person entering stuff. If it was they need to really get a life and they are so not as cool as she is. I am going to do the safe assumption and believe she is all safe and sound :)..not to mention her IM says she is in Bangalore :)

Another good thing. The West Wing started again in the states! Thank god for an s-video port on my video card (and an s video cable :) )and the internet. Woohoo..back in the mix! Disclaimer: Not that I would EVER download anything from the internet..I have never even seen this magical thing called the world wide web..

Desparate Housewives started again too! - small victories I know.

The Folks are still radically remodeling the house I grew up in. I am afraid when we go for our visit at Christmas that I won't recognize it at all. They have put all new windows and doors, redid both bathrooms (at the same time...note to Papa..not smart disabling both bathrooms at once) and the kitchen. They have repainted the whole thing inside, put a new floor in the kitchen, new carpeting in the living room, a whole new electrical system - got rid of a window and put in sliding doors to a 15x24 deck they are having built off the back....

At least the "guest room" - formerly known as MY room - is still in the same place. Okay..I really need to get over that. I am over 30 and haven't lived there for over 16 years and I still think of it as "my room". Having my giagundo bedroom set from the house I sold when I moved to Finland in that room doesn't help dispell the childish possessive streak I have for that mauve room. Mauve. Yes Mauve. Some people would call it Pink, but don't do it in front of me!
It was the first home "remodeling" project I ever did. Papa taught me how to strip wall paper, spackle and sand until the wall is smooth and how to paint edging and walls without leaving brush stroke marks. We spent a week doing that project together. It was one of the best bonding experiences with my Papa. 13 Years later he beamed with pride when I showed him my first home - completely remodeled by me and by hand. All fresh clean striped walls, spackeld and painted, sanded and poly'd hardwood floors (after ripping out wall to wall orange shag carpeting and finding beautiful solid oak floors beneath which just needed a little love and tenderness), freshly repaired ceilings with recessed lighting, a brand new italian tile floor in the kitchen... I cried when he saw it. So did he. I let him put up my new mailbox (him being a postman and all)... Point..it is probably going to happen all over again here in Finland. Part of me is sad that Papa won't be here to see it done. I am still holding out hope that we can get him and my stepmom on a plane to Helsinki...

right...back to work for me..

Who knew Ellen was to blame...

If it weren't for the huge number of people who look to this man as a spiritual leader I would laugh.

And I quote:

Pat Robertson on Sunday said that Hurricane Katrina was God’s way of expressing its anger at the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences for its selection of Ellen Degeneres to host this year’s Emmy Awards. “By choosing an avowed lesbian for this national event, these Hollywood elites have clearly invited God’s wrath,” Robertson said on “The 700 Club” on Sunday. “Is it any surprise that the Almighty chose to strike at Miss Degeneres’ hometown?”Robertson also noted that the last time Degeneres hosted the Emmys, in 2001, the September 11 terrorism attacks took place shortly before the ceremony.
“This is the second time in a row that God has invoked a disaster shortly before lesbian Ellen Degeneres hosted the Emmy Awards,” Robertson explained to his approximately one million viewers. “America is waiting for her to apologize for the death and destruction that her sexual deviance has brought onto this great nation.”
Robertson added that other tragedies of the past several years can be linked to Degeneres’ growing national prominence. September, 2003, for example, is both the month that her talk show debuted and when insurgents first gained a foothold in Iraq following the successful March invasion. “Now we know why things took a turn for the worse,” he explained.
In order to avoid further tragedy, Robertson called not only for the Television Academy to find a new heterosexual host, but to bar all homosexuals and bisexuals from taking part in the ceremony.
He said employees at the Christian Broadcasting Network had put together a list of 283 nominees, presenters, and invited guests at the Emmys known to be of sexually deviant persuasions.
“God already allows one awards show to promote the homosexual agenda,” Robertson declared. “But clearly He will not tolerate such sinful behavior to spread beyond the Tonys.”

Only 283 people? Wow, someone was not really doing their job properly. This is Hollywood folks there are more gay people in 2 square miles than that entire list! On a side note it is nice to know that God likes musicals....maybe he is a FOD? Not that there is ANYTHING wrong with that :)

FOD= Friend of Dorothy. For all you people not up on the homo lingo that means gay.

Guilty Pleasures and Shite

Right..so I have this guilty pleasure. I can't help myself...but I have to watch Footballers Wive$. It is complete trash TV..but I am addicted. I also have to watch Bad Girls. I know it is also complete trash, but without my 800 channels of cable that I used to get in the States there are few options for me to feed my TV Addiction with. I already read 4 books a month and play squash and am beginning my Finnish classes at the University again..so don't even start with the "get a hobby" crap. TV is my de-res time. I miss 800 channels.. Okay I don't miss 800 channels... I miss the Discovery Channel, TCM, E, Bravo, NBC, ABC, and Comedy Central. I also miss Showtime... Damn it! I want to be able to see REAL TIME, the West Wing, Inside the Actor's Studio, 20/20, The Daily Show, The L Word, random comedy specials with stand-ups that make you spit out your diet coke from laughing so hard.

I am not going to say Finnish TV is complete Shite, because it has its share of social porn (Cheaters anyone?) and imported British TV as well as US TV (albeit 2 seasons behind). If it wasn't for the net, I would be HOPELESSLY behind on the whole Jimmy Smits running for the Pres thing. Last season's West Wing is running now..at 11:15 in the frickin evening! S-video cable and a video card to the rescue thank goodness...

Maybe it is a good thing I can't watch so much TV? Nah... Screw that shite, I love TV!

cough..hack..sneeze..sniffle..BASTARD!!..and the radio

Okay so as I posted earlier - I have a WICKED chest/head cold. I am up all hours of the night coughing and hacking up disgusting icky yuckiness out of my lungs and my sinuses are so full I feel like I am walking around with an extra 10lbs just in my head. Let's not go anywhere near the amount of extra weight I am carrying in other places - I am a cranky yank right now - Not to mention that with the stuffed sinuses comes the inability to hear anything which isn't shouted or roared at me. note to self: look both ways 3 times before crossing the street/train tracks/etc until I can hear properly again

I spent the last 3 days on a Certification course which my employer requires I pass. I took the exam and now have to wait for 3 weeks or so for the results. Three days of a very nice man droning on and on about BS 7925-1 and 2..IEEE 829..all the technical mumbo jumbo. The whole while I am hacking up what remains of my lungs, single handedly depleating the national supply of nose tissues and infecting the entire air space with my germs from hell. I would have much rather stayed home in bed with a nice cup of tea and some chicken soup, but my employer paid a large amount of money for me to be there. -Holy hell I miss Campbell's or Progresso Chicken Soup - As Mira has noted in humor, the common cold, broken bones, the plague - all are cured by Chicken Soup from an American point of view. DAMN RIGHT! - Chicken Noodle, Chicken and Stars, Chicken and Rice...yum. A bit overly salty, but very yummy for those people (like myself) who have extreem difficulty tasting ANYTHING because of completely blocked sinuses. Not only was I at this course, but I had to return to my office each night to do work because one of the projects I am on is at a critical milestone today. Not a fun week. I think it is sweats, tea and a dvd with a nice beef stew for dinner. - and before you even ask I make my OWN from scratch...I might have time constraints so I am not so sure on the stew at this point..watery beef stew is icky..and a good one takes hours of stewing.

Onto the BASTARD part. One word: VETO. Frickin Arnold "Itty Bitty Balls" Schwarzenegger is going to veto the law that the California Legislature just passed which would make marriage between "2 persons". I can't stand this crap. If the conservative right wing blinder wearin mo-fo's don't want gays to "marry" then don't use the frickin word! Let's face it..marriage is not a secular word..never has been. Call it "Flying Purple Elephants" for all I care! Every time the word marriage is used, the religious nutters pull a huge hissy fit. The US is supposed to be all about equality and abhorring discrimination. Oh wait..right..that is only if you are white and straight. Sorry my bad.

Bastard part 2... I arrived home at 8 last night from work to find a letter in my mail. It was from the Helsingin Kaupunki Terveyskeskus (Helsinkiy City Health Center). Now, I speak Finnish and I read Finnish and I can even write in Finnish (albeit slowly with spelling mistakes as I pointed out earlier..spell check and re-reading 3 times before hitting send or snail mailing is important still) so I was not overly put off by the letter being in Finnish. As stated earlier, I have Lesbian Cooties (thanks Dr. Kristin for giving it a name!). The whole reaaaaaaaaaaaaaly high white blood cell count thing (seriously outside the "standard deviation"..whatever that means). Anywhoo..Dr and I have been trying to figure out what the hell it is. Without going into the loooooooong version here is the deal: She is at a loss. She referred my case to the University Hospital - because I have to see a hemotologist, an internal medicine specialist and if necessary an endocrinologist. - Back to the Letter - The letter is NOT from the University hospital but the city. They have reserved 3 appointments for me:

1.) go get stuck with needles again - thankfully not Vampyrella this time..although I must wait and see if THIS person is a far-sighted vampyre too -
2.) Ultrasound on my tummy - goopy stuff and a black and white image..although why my tummy I have no idea...
3.) Actual consultation with the Dr.(s) who will be trying to determine what kind of Lesbian Cooties I actually have...

Now..I have been going through this since the beginning of July. I am really sick of being prodded and havin people in white lab coats go "hmmm...mmmm..hmmm" and then not being able to tell me what is wrong. These 3 appointments are for fricking OCTOBER! The blood stuff - October 6th. The Dr consult October fricking 24th..and the UltraSound 17th of October. BASTARDS!!!! I am in Italy from 15-22 Oct!!! Now I have to 1.) call my Dr and find out of the Helsinki City Health Center is the place she had my stuff sent to and NOT the University like she said. and 2.) Reschedule the ultrasound for a date before I go to Italy - which I am not sure will be possible..which will then move my actual Dr. consultation even further... Jesus H. Christ on a pogo stick.. I mean seriously..it will be 4 months of this crap by the time I see the Hemotologist/Internal Medicine Specialist/Endocrinologist..

Radio:
My workmate/friend/political debate punching bag Phil has a "radio show" here in Finland. Okay not a radio show but a podcast from Radio Free Finland. He has approached me about being a guest on his show. An hour long discussion about lesbians in Finland(from a foreigner's point of view). There are several issues I can see popping up with this. Among them are that he and I are hot heads when it comes to politics. He is a Libertarian...nuff said. I am a die-hard bleeding heart liberal (those Log Cabin Republicans are just big fat liars..to themselves and the gay community)... We have some seriously good old fashioned shirt sleeves rolled up debates (arguments) about politics. - not so sure if it won't spiral down to me giving him a verbal spanking on US Law and the Constitution for an hour regarding gay rights, gun laws and the war on drugs..not to mention education, social programs, the welfare system, social security and health care... Should be interesting... or a complete blood bath...

Horrors..and a bright note

Okay. The news (american) has been saturated with coverage of the disaster in the Gulf Coast of the US. I have avoided posting on it and tried to keep my shock and horror to myself about the behaviour of some of the citizenry and the government of the US in respect to this disaster. I have failed. I was a victim of my political outrage at a fellow foreigner here in Finland. Phil got my goat and got it good.

So I am going on record: The Federal, State and Local governments as well as the emergency relief organizations and agencies failed the people of New Orleans. The behavior of roving armed gangs is abhorent and no amount of "gun control laws" - as Phil likes to think is responsible for this - would have stopped this. People broke into stores and stole the guns. Simple as that. The relief organization, strategy and execution has failed. Mr.director of FEMA has not done his job. People are dead and more continue to die. It is devestating and horrible. Shame on the government, shame on FEMA.

There I said it.


On a bright note, I saw the Northern Lights for the first time this weekend while away at cottage. It was breathtaking. I have also developed a horrible chest cold...

ahhhhhhhhhh

It says NY is 3.5 back :)


I am off to cottage again this weekend for the "crab" party. They aren't really crabs, and they aren't really crayfish...they look like miniture Lobsters... Anyway...lots of them and drinking..and reading a good book along with going to Sauna :)

Moo..

There is an old saying the French use to describe most non-french speaking their language "Vous parlez le français comme une vache espagnole" which means: "You speak French like a Spanish Cow". I have heard this once or 400 times in my life. I speak French well enough to offend an entire country. And when it comes to the French, merely being NOT French offends them. Of course I am half French (thanks Dad) so I am only 1/2 as despised. That is until they find out exactly how poorly I speak French (again Thanks Dad) and then it is even worse. Having a French papa should mean that I speak French well. Right? Wrong.

Anywho..there is a point to this. I was writing an email in Finnish this morning requesting information about something. The sentence I was writing referenced "in the mornings". Example "I like to exercise in the morning". Finnish makes you pluralize it (don't even get me started on the difference between partative, plural and plural partative..it will give you a headache) so it comes out "in the mornings" meaning every morning or some mornings.

Simple examples are the best I can give you. If you want something happens 1 time (today or tomorrow) there is a specific way to write it by conjugating the word. The same goes for something that happens many times or during specific time frames (like weekends or in the mornings). There are many many rules in Finnish, and to give you all the permiations of this would hurt MY brain and ruin the fun.

So this is what happened:

I wanted to ask "Does it fit if we could come in the mornings?"

I wrote: Sopiiko jos voisimme tulla ammuisin?

Spelling counts folks. By missing one "a" and adding an "m", what I actually wrote was: "Does it fit if we could come I would moo?"

Apparently I speak Finnish like a cow too! Moooooooooooo

for your edification:

aamuisin - in the mornings
ammuisin - I would MOOO